A Type A Christmas Story
As we approach the beauty of Christmas, the anticipated season encompasses feelings of excitement and wonder for all ages. The Christians of the world pause to celebrate the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ, and churches come together to bring a sense of peace and hope unto all the world. The Christmas story is generously spread to those less fortunate through acts of kindness and love via donations of food, clothing, and toys. Communities gather together for Christmas tree lightings, beautiful holiday music, and live nativity scenes. The final month of the year also brings a time of individual reflection as we not only recognize our accomplishments throughout the previous months but also identify goals for the upcoming year. There is a certain magic in the crisp December air that is unmistakable; unfortunately, the true meaning of Christmas can be overlooked due to our busy schedules, which undoubtedly brings STRESS to the Type A Christians of the world!
Type A individuals always set high expectations and the Christmas season is definitely not exempt.
We embellish our homes with lavish decorations, engage our children with elaborate Elf on the Shelf ideas, entertain our friends at festive gatherings in our homes, organize social events for co-workers, schedule church activities for all ages, and develop working schedules for Christmas brunch and dinners with extended family members! I will be the first to admit in my role as wife and mom, ob-gyn nurse practitioner, Christian media blogger, and singer on our church praise team—the Christmas season is slightly overwhelming at times. But, this year I have added another task for my to-do list, which is to enjoy the splendor and glory of Christmas as we celebrate not just the birth of the newborn King but His promised return as well!
In starting to write this article, we are currently in the mid-autumnal season and the beautiful fall foliage is starting to collect on our withering grass. I truly love this time of year as it brings a sense of calmness before the scheduling storm of the holiday season. Despite adjusting to our daughter’s return to school and acclimation to a new grade level, I always feel like fall is a season of rest, especially after completing our busy spring and summer schedules.
Spring is always a demanding time for us as my husband serves as the head baseball coach and teacher at a local high school. And while he is a supportive husband and father, I often consider myself a single parent during his baseball season while cooking dinners, cleaning the house, and helping our daughter learn various methods of common core multiplication. However, as soon as baseball season comes to an end, my daughter and husband wrap-up another school year as summer quickly approaches. My husband and daughter are then able to enjoy a restful break, while I continue working my 9-5 job. Let’s be honest—it’s very challenging to leave them at home some days, but I have a wonderful job that I do not take for granted in talking to women on a daily basis! The summer days are long for me, but I try to keep up with my husband and daughter after I return home from work and help with various house projects that are typically ignored during the school year. While sometimes exhausted, I do find pleasure and a sense of accomplishment when checking off tasks from my to-do lists. And then as summer vacation and extended bedtimes come to an end, I actually find relief when the new school year starts, and our schedule is…well, back on schedule!
Creating an organized schedule is important to me because it provides structure over various priorities, especially throughout the holiday season when our time is so very limited. My husband, daughter, and I are blessed to live in the same area as our extended families, but this also means our time must be divided equally.
We have various family traditions on both sides that have required careful selection over the last seventeen years of marriage, and unfortunately, this has required missing certain obligations on one side or the other. Thankfully, our families are understanding, but I am tired of feeling rushed through the holiday season.
Not only do I have family commitments, but I also have responsibilities to my church and work. So, how do we overcome our endless calendar of events during the last month of the year? A four-syllable word…delegation, or perhaps an even better word, INVITATION
In researching for my “Type A Christian” book, I learned about various types of personalities.
The only thing I knew prior to writing is that there are people who are ‘Type A’ and there are people who are not! Type A’s are usually self-motivated, goal-oriented, and self-reliant. We typically maintain a sense of urgency in fulfilling every task set before us and take pride in receiving compliments from those who benefit from our good deeds.
However, there are some negative traits that I discovered about myself in maintaining a Type A personality. I am quick-tempered when I do not get my way and often self-centered when others have ideas that differ from my own opinions, and I am often inconsiderate in expecting others to perform at my same pace. However, I did learn some valuable information from my research in regards to those who do not consider themselves Type A. For example, many with Type B personalities may procrastinate on specific tasks, but after completion, they actually take the time to enjoy reaching their goals before immediately jumping into another task like Type A’s. Type B’s are usually less anxious than Type A’ when trying to meet obligatory deadlines, but nonetheless, they are still willing to help with various opportunities. Type B’s may also feel insecure and unsolicited when compared to those who exhibit outgoing and controlling personalities. This may cause Type A’s to feel overwhelmed with even more tasks because Type B’s may feel redundant and exclude themselves altogether…
To explain this phenomenon, I want to share about a recent visit to a local coffee shop. I was recently ordering some decaf mochas, but the managing barista initially started making the typical caffeinated versions. She quickly realized her mistake and stated her understanding as to why customers order decaf coffees, including heart conditions, pregnancy, and my personal reason—migraines. We began a friendly conversation and she mentioned that one of her employees recently made the statement that decaf coffee drinkers are not real coffee drinkers. The manager quickly told the employee that decaf drinkers are actually truer fans of coffee.
Her reasoning because decaf drinkers continue to drink coffee despite receiving the actual benefits of drinking caffeine, specifically a jolt in energy and mental clarity.
As I was thinking about different personality types around the holidays, I thought about her statements. While Type A’s are typically the ‘caffeinated’ versions of Christians and display more intense, observable actions, Type B’s may be described as the ‘decaffeinated’ versions due to their more subdued traits. Type A’s must understand that even though other individuals may not exhibit outward expressions of a passionate personality, Type B’s are still passionate Christians even if they work behind the scenes. Just like there are multiple reasons for drinking decaf, there are multiple reasons that individuals do not like seeking attention, such as anxiety and a fear of public speaking. And while Type B’s may not offer the same jolt or kick like those with caffeinated personalities, they still enjoy the same spark and flavor for the Christmas season.
So, when you feel like you are holding the weight of the holidays on your shoulders, remember to extend an invitation to anyone who is willing to contribute. Once you realize that you don’t have to do everything on your own, look for ways to encourage others to serve in ways that suit their strengths. Family members, co-workers, or members of your church may not be as outspoken and prefer to work behind-the-scenes, but when given the opportunity, they make valuable contributions, such as planning, decorating, scheduling menus, cooking, shopping, wrapping gifts, and executing various activities. Just one quick biblical suggestion, don’t be quick to judge their recommendations! The book of James tells us to be quick to listen and slow to speak (1:19), while the book of Philippians tells us to look to the interests of others, not ourselves (2:4). We all want to feel included regardless of personality type, and it is very difficult to feel included when others are controlling the holiday environment. Just because Type A’s are perfectionists, this does not mean that every idea we have is perfect! And, while some may procrastinate and not work on our timely expectations, learn to be patient and open to change!
And don’t forget that children love to feel involved through the holidays as well! My daughter loves to surprise others especially in regards to baking, but while she typically functions at one speed, I know she likes to help and I include her as often as I can. This year my aim is to work on recipes a few weekends in advance and then freeze until needed.
This will not only provide “quality time” with my daughter and fill her “love tank,” but it will also decrease the tasks that I have to complete and allow more time to spend with other family members during Christmas. And when you’re in the kitchen with your children, parents, or friends, don’t forget to turn up the music! There are multiple sources that suggest singing along with music actually decreases stress hormones! Let’s be honest, we all know that the Christmas season can be hectic due to the amount of work, but the choice is ours—we can either choose to complete our tasks out of necessity or out of love by creating a fun work environment.
So, how does delegation and invitation improve our relationship with our Savior throughout the Christmas season?
Well, for one, we are honoring His commandments in sharing quality time with those we love but also allowing more time to share His message of hope and grace with the rest of the world. Christmas takes on different meanings for everyone. For some, it is a celebration of Jesus’ birth, while others are curious why stores and restaurants are closed. The great commission teaches us to share how Jesus was sent from Heaven, crucified to save us from our sins, and resurrected by the Heavenly Father to prepare a place for His believers. I for one look forward to the Christmas season for not only creating precious memories with loved ones but also anticipating Christ’s promised return. Inviting others to fulfill various obligations are key to decreasing stress throughout the month of December, but the most important invitation you can offer is the love, hope, and grace of Jesus Christ. There are so many who will be celebrating Christmas this year without a loved one, but there is One who can fill that void—and He may be using you to extend a special Christmas invitation in more ways than one!
